


White Bear

by Miang



Category: Suikoden
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-11-02
Updated: 2005-11-02
Packaged: 2017-10-26 00:22:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/276496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miang/pseuds/Miang
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Keeping control of one's thoughts is hard enough without a true rune egging you on.</p>
            </blockquote>





	White Bear

I think about the life I left behind, sometimes.

I think about the life I left behind, and the cursed rune twitches.

I think about our home and the stone walls that warmed me in the winter. I think about Cleo, and trying to sneak peeks in her diary -

 _"Young master, you should knock before entering the room of a lady"_

\- and Pahn, and the cursed rune burns.

I think about Pahn, who could have killed my father once, should have, should have spared me -

I think about Pahn, whose diary held notes about meals. Gremio's meals. Meals he ate, delicious recipes prepared with the food my father earned for us, and the rune laughs and I don't think about Pahn anymore.

I think about Cleo, her warm smile, and how she would always chuckle and pretend to swat at Ted when he'd cross an invisible line with her.

I think about Ted and my world falls apart.

Gremio enters the next morning, and I'm certain he knows. He's made a career out of watching me, after all; I can't so much as flare a nostril without him throwing tissues and blankets in my direction and rushing to close windows.

I don't mind.

But I won't think about why.

Gremio has learned with time, though, and rather than betray his suspicions that all is not well, he simply invites me down to breakfast. He gently asks where I would like to go next, but that requires that I think about where we are now, and _that_ requires that I think about how and why we got here.

I close my eyes, and breathe. The rune thrums in time with my heartbeat, but it seems content to stay silent for now. _Thank you_ , I want to say, but I don't know who I'd be saying it to, and I stifle a sudden urge to laugh hysterically. Instead, I open my eyes.

"Banner Village," I say softly, and half-smile. Gremio's eyes widen just a fraction, and I continue - quickly, before the words freeze and die in my throat. "I hear . . . I hear they have good fishing there."

My father loved to fish, but I can't think about that.


End file.
